Restore.

Yes, I am trying to renew my once happy, smiling self. I'm restarting, beginning again.  Today I had a change in my point of view. I heard an idea, a thought, if you will, from my boyfriends 87 year old grandmother who, so far, seems to be invincible. She told me that as we get older we start to remember our past and childhood much clearer than we did when we were growing up. Little memories that we didn't know we even had start popping up and even though we didn't know we had those memories, they somehow help us cope with the troubles of our everyday lives. As soon as she told me this a memory popped into my head about my Barbie themed birthday party when I was around 8 or 9. I remember the pink, white and purple balloons that framed the door way as guests walked in. The Barbie head birthday cake that my amazing mother made for me.  What I remember most is the excitement I felt when my parents told me "close your eyes, we have a big surprise for you."  With my eyes squeezed shut so tight I thought I might not even be able to open them again, my parents pushed in a huge mound of wrapping paper with a huge pink bow on it and told me "ok open your eyes and start unwrapping!" A gigantic smile came across my face as I ripped the paper off. It was a pink Barbie Corvette! I had a pink Barbie Corvette to drive around in with my friends.  My dad and uncles immediately took it outside so I could start driving it on the sidewalk. It was one of the greatest birthday parties I had ever had.  That is one of the many positive thoughts I'll keep for when I feel like I need a boost.  And so I say today is a new day, a new beginning so to speak. I vow that I will never let any negativity get to me the way it has in the past. I will always think positive thoughts no matter what.  Stay positive my friends, it's going to make a world of difference.  See you in the future. -Jackie